• Tour de France

    Murray Lachlan Young 03/07/014

    Through Aysgarth, Masham, Middleham
    Through Otley, Ilkley, Skipton, Reeth
    Through Mont Noir, Paris and Carcasson
    Via butter tubs o'er lofty peak

    The whirr of ten times forty wheels
    A carb-fuelled, quad pumped, flying wedge
    A jockeying of shifting deals
    All balanced on a razors edge

    A haw-hee-haw, ah ha, ha, ha!
    Le Yorkshire tea au lait, pour moi?
    Regarde vous , je ne cest qoui
    Le Yorkshire 'Pud' No! Ooh la, la!

    From Black sheep ale to Bergerac
    St Etienne they journey far
    Chris Froome this time? Or Contador!
    Le Rosbif Roi? Or, no cigar?

    But one thing that we know for sure
    Half man machine half whippet thin
    As down the champs Elise rides
    The ‘Maillot Jaune’ anointed king

    This festival of mother France
    This grand fromage procession home
    Will wear a certain cussed pride: 
    (born of (among other things) financially prudent pragmatism, also calling a spade a spade and not being afraid to speak its mind) 
    For this year it be Yorkshire grown.

    'Le Yorkshire tour mama it come!
    Allez, allez, regarde la!
    Le ‘Eee oop’ et le ‘Eee ba goom’
    Ou est Le ‘Bobby dazzelar?’